An introduction to the Barry! Blog

For those of you who don't already know (and I would imagine that is the entire world population except for maybe ten people, and ten is probably an overly generous estimate), I would like to explain the significance (and to consider it significant is likely overly generous as well) of the title of this forum (I say "forum" because it is my hope to eventually have friends and allies also writing content for the blog). My apologies for the syntactical nightmare of the previous sentence, but I had to ensure that readers of this blog will be up to the challenge of fancy grammar (3 parentheses in one sentence?!), old-timey words (bully!), and sometimes dry topics (fantasy hockey). Anyways, on to the explanation of "Barry! Blog."

For the majority of my life I have named the pets in my household. I fancy myself to be quite creative with my name selections, and in return for my excellent names, I believe my pets respond to my beckoning with extra vigor and satisfaction. Here is a sampling of some of the best: Grover, Opie, Folger, Yuban, Maxwell. You may notice that the last three are variations of coffee brands (I thoroughly enjoy the beverage), though they have been tweaked slightly to become aesthetically appealing fish names. Opie and Grover are cats. Opie is named after a camp counselor I really admired when I was a kid, and I feel that it really suits a frisky Japanese Bobtail well. My grandmother thought that I named Grover after President Grover Cleveland. I wish that I had been that creative when naming our gentle giant. Grover is named after the blue Sesame Street rascal. I know what you are thinking: Andrew, way to jump on the 'name-your-animal-after-muppet-and muppet-related-characters bandwagon!' Well maybe I did and maybe I did, but Grover stuck and I am fairly certain that he introduces himself with a little extra pride when cavorting with the other felines of the neighborhood. But as I said, I wish that I had had the foresight of my grandmother to see the tremendous potential in naming your animals after people. During high school, I schemed up names for dogs and cats like Roger, Brent, and Victoria. However, it was not until college and the "work years" that I truly saw the potential in a well crafted people/animal name. I am not the only one (and certainly not the first) to appreciate the potential in such naming. David Sedaris has a short story where he talks about naming all the creatures living in his French home. I believe he named a spider "Carlos." See what I mean? A spider named Carlos? It makes perfect sense. Why not give a creature a smart name like Carlos. It's dignified, professional, SFW, and does not demean the magnificence of the creature. Compare that to a name like "Shnookums," "Fido," or a personal favorite to mock, "Spot." Instead of naming your animal after a simple quality that it may not even possess, give him/her the respect they deserve (don't alert the Grammar Police, you read my caveat).

You are probably getting some ideas about the title of the blog. Perhaps a current pet? Maybe a tribute to one long departed? Well, Barry is not a name of a specific creature. It began to develop when my friend Matt and I were playing a game to pass the time as we walked to coffee (on a side not, my favorite large coffee chain is Peet's). We just came up with a dog breed and an appropriate name for it. I can't remember the combinations we came up with except for one. We decided it would be delightful to name a long-haired Dachshund Barry. With a lot of emphasis. Roll your R's and yell it a little. Eventually, I decided to begin calling all dogs Barries. The problem is that I sometimes forget because calling a dog a dog is ingrained quite strongly, but fortunately my friends will correct me. However, in the purest sense, a Barry is a long-haired Dachshund, which we all can agree is the noblest of breeds. What better way to honor their rich heritage than with a regal name like Barry?

If you are still reading, you probably wonder where this is all going. I don't intent this to be a forum for stream-of-consciousness writing, but I am taking a little longer to get to the point. So here it is. I want this to be a collection of writing about all sorts of topics. Nothing original there, but I hope to give a different spin and look at things in creative ways. Perhaps bring attention to topics that seem mundane but actually have points of interest. I make no promises about the content, quality, or consistency of this blog. If no one reads it I will still have a chance to keep up with writing and get out some of the ideas I have. And drop the next big thing with animal names. Leopold the Springer Spaniel. Now we're cooking with gas!